08/05/17

I will be moving into college in 3 days. All of my friends are excited and ready to get away from home. Don’t get me wrong, so do I, but I am also so nervous that I think that I might actually throw up. I don’t want to make new friends. I love the ones I have. I don’t want to feel like I am all alone in this world, even though I know that my mom will always be there. What if I can’t handle the workload? What if I never actually make any friends? What if my job is awful and I hate it there? I guess the next question is what if the sky falls or what if the sun never comes up? They are all what ifs in this uncertainty of life, but yet I still manage to dwell on them and imagine the worst. I would like to think it’s a talent, but honestly it is a burden. The anxiety and fear hold me back from ever experiencing anything. I’m scared of so many things happening. I just hope that fear won’t hold me back in college. It is a time to actually be who I am. I will not hold back and I will make friends. p.s. did you see that change of events? This is what I went through tonight as my pep talk to keep me from freaking out. p.p.s. it is raining and I am watching How I Met Your Mother because that show makes me happy.

I hope you pep talk yourself everyday because you are a wonderful human being. You deserve love and respect. Be the best you that you can be today.

(This post is going up a day late because our power went out while I was typing this up)

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Starting a Blog

Some people may ask why I want to start a blog and share my thoughts with random strangers rather than just write in a diary. Sometimes its nice to think that somebody out there is actually listening and cares what you’re saying. Now I don’t want you to think that I have a bad home life or anything of that sort. I have a great family and great friends, but I have some problems opening up to people and so here I am opening up to complete strangers. Makes sense, right? I’m also thinking about people that could potentially read my blog. What if I share a similar experience with one reader or what if my mistakes could possibly help a reader or what if…honestly I could go on and on with the ‘what ifs’. I’m not exactly sure what will happen with this blog. So folks, sit down, grab a snack, and listen to how I am somewhat adulting.